The Vibrant Moment – Remember: Let Go and Relax.
Tools from the Center for New Psychology
Publisher: Doris Jeanette, Holistic Psychology Mentor, Coach
Visit: http://www.drjeanette.com

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I often get questions such as this: “Why is it that I cannot let go and relax?”

First, let’s define what letting go actually is: Letting go is relaxing, surrendering, flowing. An example is what you do or do not do in the natural river current. Do you go with the flow or resist the flow? To enjoy a vibrant moment, you are physically relaxed in the natural flow of energy around you.

The opposite of letting go is: posturing, deciding, controlling. When you fight to swim up stream or refuse to get in the water you are not letting go. You are controlling. You are trying to be in charge of what happens and make things the way you want them to be or not be.

Is it easy for you to relax and surrender? Or is it easy for you to control and decide? Unless you have engaged in years of personal growth, you probably are not comfortable relaxing and surrendering.

In order to let go of control and trust the reality around you you have to feel safe and secure with your ability to go with the flow. Is this river really safe and am I prepared and strong enough to go where it is going for the time I am in it? To reach this degree of physical and emotional security you must consciously examine and transform your real fears, learned anxieties, and mental judgments.

Therefore, the answer to the question, “Why is it that I cannot let go and relax?”is: You are afraid. Fear is what keeps you from letting go and relaxing. Anxiety is always involved, but underneath your irrational anxiety is a real fear (or real fears) that must be resolved in a way that allows you to be comfortable and secure.

Only when you are not afraid and anxious can you relax and surrender. This is a given. It would not be wise for you to let go and relax if you were in any real danger. Real fears must be taken seriously, and never denied. Real fears are nature’s way of keeping you safe and sane.

Regular readers of The Vibrant Moment know that since last Spring my mother’s health has been failing. I shared my initial panic at the thought of her death in April and some of my ensuring fears and anxieties during the summer. Right now, I am by her side, as she is moving out of sight into another form. Death is the ultimate letting go for both her and her children.

Invest in the time, energy, and effort that it takes to learn how to safely let go and relax as you move through real life events. There is no other psychological skill more important.

Learning how to let go and relax dramatically improves your experiences, adventures, and self-esteem. Do it.

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LET GO AND RELAX: There is a big difference between anxiety and fear and this difference is what you must learn to be successful in safely letting go of control. The Opening the Heart audio teaches you this difference. Three hours of audio on feelings, fear, and hurt, $97.00, money-back guaranteed.

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Order “Overcome Anxiety Naturally” to safely surrender:
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The Vibrant Moment – Remember: Use Your Tools Effectively.
Tools from the Center for New Psychology
Publisher: Doris Jeanette, Holistic Psychology Mentor, Coach
Visit: http://www.drjeanette.com

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What tools do you have in your personal growth toolbox?
Do you know where and how to use each tool?

Let’s look into your toolbox and see how prepared you are for personal and professional success. You need a toolbox full of the best tools you can find. Where do you look for effective, powerful tools?

Are the available psychological offerings approved by managed care insurance enough to help you be effective and successful in reaching your personal growth goals? At the top of the current evidence based list traditional psychologists are teaching you in 2015 we find: Cognitive Behavior Therapy, Mindfulness, and EMDR

When I look at this list as a holistic psychology with thirty-seven years of experience teaching people how to successfully overcome anxiety, I see a limited list of techniques, which are tools. Before managed care, psychologists offered these evidence-based psychological tools: Relaxation Therapy, Desensitization, Assertiveness Training, Reality Therapy, Paradoxical Intention, Consciousness Raising, Sex Therapy, and meditation. Consider getting an education in some of these powerful techniques.

In addition to the above tools, my toolbox has: Body Language, Energy Awareness, Creative Meditation, Sound Therapy, Color Therapy, Music Therapy, Body Awareness, Emotional Awareness, Psycho-physical Exercises, Visualization, and High Play.

Of course you need a hammer, screwdriver, wrench, and pliers in your toolbox. Just one tool is not enough. Pick the most effective, powerful tools you can find and get your toolbox ready for personal growth. However, having the correct power tools in your toolbox is not enough.

Any technique is only as effective as the person using the tool. Do you know when, where, and how to use your CBT to be effective? Do you know when to you use your hammer and what to do with your mindfulness? You need good tools in the first place AND you must be able to use those tools effectively in real life.

For example, a friend recently complained to me that Relaxation Therapy had never helped him. He knew I studied with Joe Wolpe in the 1970’s. Dr. Wolpe, taught his students to desensitize people to anything that made them anxious using Relaxation Therapy. My friend complained to me that he had listened to so many relaxation audios and guided meditations over and over again and had never experienced any relief from his generalized anxiety.

My friend had Relaxation Therapy in his toolbox but he did not know how to use his relaxation tool effectively. To put a picture up on the wall, you have to pick up your hammer and hit the nail at the correct time, in the right way, to be effective. If you want to unlearn your anxiety responses you have to use your tool of relaxation with great precision.

If you do not use your relaxation response at the correct time to desensitize yourself to the proper specific stimulus then of course it does not work. Having the ability to relax, be mindful, meditate are not effective in the bigger picture of transformation unless you use your tools correctly. To be effective you must unlearn your unhelpful, anxious behaviors and avoidance reactions.

IMAGINE: You get your toolbox full of effective, power tools. You learn how to use your tools effectively so you hit the nail on the head, thereby reaching your personal and professional goals in 2015.

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NEED HELP UNLEARNING ANXIETY? Learn how to get out of anxiety and panic energy in the first written lesson in the home-study course, “Overcome Anxiety Naturally.” Learn step by step how to get in your body, get grounded and keep your anxiety lower as you move through current stress, and unlearn old anxiety behaviors. Order the home-study course, “Overcome Anxiety Naturally.” $149.97, five hours of audio, 10 written lessons. Money-back guarantee.

Read more and order “Overcome Anxiety Naturally”:
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NEED TO BE ASSERTIVE? Want to be effective in getting more money and a better job? Get more of what you want from loved ones, supervisors, and strangers. The best investment you can make is becoming more assertive. Learn what is assertive behavior. Then, learn how to use your new skills in real life situations so you stay on the pathway to success. 46 pages, six hours of audio, $149.97, money-back guarantee.

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The Vibrant Moment – Remember: Be successful.
Tools from the Center for New Psychology
Publisher: Doris Jeanette, Holistic Psychology Mentor, Coach
Visit: http://www.drjeanette.com

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Since positive change does not just happen, this means you have to Make It happen. So, to be successful, you must set in motion the mandatory actions that lead to your goals. Losing weight, eating better, feeling more self-confident, having a good sex life, and living more fully must be purposefully programmed for success.

For starters, you must know the real, physical pathway that leads to your goal. You need to know exactly what, when, where, and how to practice what you need to learn in order to reach your goal. Practicing the wrong behaviors at the wrong time can actually makes things worse, not better!

This always reminds me of Aunt Franny. Her physician told her to practice breathing twice every day for ten minutes. Caring about her health, Aunt Franny did as she was told. During a visit with Aunt Franny, she rushed out to the patio hyperventilating. She was breathless and red faced. Since this was not like Aunt Franny, I asked her what she was doing. She replied, “Practicing my breathing exercise, like my doctor told me to do for ten minutes.”

Wow, it was immediately clear her physician had not told her how to breathe properly. She was breathing the same old way she had always breathed. As a result, she was making herself hyperventilate. Instead of reducing her anxiety, her breathing practice had given her a full-blown panic attack. As a result, Aunt Franny’s heart was being damaged, instead of calmed down. Yes, I immediately gave her a lesson on how to breathe properly so that she did not hyperventilate and get herself into a panic the next time she did what the doctor ordered.

This is the reason it is imperative that you know how to breathe, relax, and be assertive in the proven ways that work. Just going out on your own, without the proper instructions from a competent teacher does not make you successful and effective. The correct education is essential. Also, be careful and picky when choosing your teachers. A client of mine recently increased her anxiety when she did what her Yoga teacher instructed her to do.

This means you need to work with professionals who are present with you in the moment and know the pathway that leads to your goals. Make sure you pick teachers, coaches, and holistic psychologists who practice what they preach. This means they show you, by example, how to reach your goals. Good mentors model the healthy behaviors you need to practice so you see the living proof of what they are teaching you.

IMAGINE: At the end of next year, you feel proud of yourself because you received the education you need. Then you practiced the new, correct skills so much that you became effective and successful in reaching your New Year’s Resolutions. Yahoo!

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Please share this holistic psychology information with friends, family, and colleagues who are interested in being successful: http://www.drjeanette.com

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PROPER BREATHING? Get solid, reliable breathing instructions. Learn how to get out of anxiety and panic in the first written lesson in the home-study course, “Overcome Anxiety Naturally,” by breathing properly. Then learn how to get in your body, get grounded and keep your anxiety lower as you move through current stress, and unlearn old anxiety habits. Order the home-study course, “Overcome Anxiety Naturally.” $149.97, five hours of audio, 10 written lessons. Money-back guarantee.

Read more and order “Overcome Anxiety Naturally”:
http://www.drjeanette.com/anxietyonlinecourse.html

================================

ALREADY TAKEN THE ANXIETY COURSE? Want to be effective in getting more money and a better job? Get more of what you want from loved ones, supervisors, and strangers. The best investment you can make is becoming more assertive. Learn what is assertive behavior. Then, learn how to use your new skills in real life situations so you stay on the pathway to success. 46 pages, six hours of audio, $149.97, money-back guarantee.

Read more and order:
http://www.drjeanette.com/assertivenesstrainingcourse.html

WINTER BLUES SPECIAL: Order the Assertiveness Training course, “Stop the World From Pushing You Around: Six Weeks to Solid Self-Confidence,” and get the one-hour audio, “Depression: How to Unlearn Your Unhealthy Conditioning and Break Free,” for FREE. Sells for $29.97.
http://www.drjeanette.com/depressionaudio.html
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