Relationship Advice: How to Get Close to Others? Plug in!



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Eureka Springs, Arkansas, Fall, 2013

Nature is a great place to plug in to your genuine self.



The Vibrant Moment – Plug In to Connect.

Tools from the Center for New Psychology
Publisher: Doris Jeanette, Holistic Psychology Mentor, Coach


Do you long to be close to others emotionally?
Do you want to give and receive hugs with ease?

I used to watch other students at East Carolina University, a very long time ago, hug each other with comfort and ease. As a freshman psychology student, I desired to have the closeness I saw between my fellow classmates. Yet, I did not have a clue how the boys and girls I saw connected so effortlessly with each other.

During my sophomore year, my desire to be close to people outside of my family gave me the courage to allow my friends to move closer to me. Slowly, I relaxed into the comfort of sitting closer to friends in the dorm and at the student center. I shared my feelings with them by writing poetry and letting them read it, especially when the poem was about them. As I let my friends see who I really was inside, the magic happened – we connected.

After studying the emotional and energy dynamics of relationships for 37 years, I know that being intimate is a fact that is supported by solid physical data. This is the reason I base my new holistic psychology approach on energy and the laws of physics. It does not matter what you think; if you want to be close to others, you must allow a physical connection to take place.

There is a specific point, spot, physical place where you must plug into another person. There are no words or topic that allows a connection to occur. However, you can use words and topics to find a way to get into another person’s world. You must find a point of entry into the other person’s reality. You must be an emotionally safe person in order to be successful. Otherwise, you are not trustworthy. Once you plug into the other person, they must receive you.

When there is an energy exchange between two people, the magic happens.

Most people miss each other. They live their lives on the surface bouncing off each other. They think they are close to others and yet their body is not relaxed enough to make a physical connection. Neither is their heart open enough to allow a genuine emotional intimacy to occur.

Do you let others close?

Your image, which is your ego, is composed of frozen energy, which does not allow a genuine physical connection to occur. Therefore, if you relate, image to image and ego to ego, you do not experience a genuine closeness because you are not literally plugging into another person. Images and egos bounce off each other and do not connect energetically with each other.

Therefore, if you share your image and ego with others you feel empty, isolated and void. On the other hand, if you share the emotional truth in your heart and the physical truth in your body, there is a chance another person will receive you. If they do, you experience a delicious, exciting, comforting vibrant moment. You feel full of life because your real self has connected with another real self and there is the magic of intimacy.

In order to share yourself with others you have to know yourself. So the first step is to connect with your real emotional and physical self. You must be connected with yourself before others can connect with you. Otherwise there is no real place for others to plug in.

Plug into yourself to connect with others.


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