The Vibrant Moment – Remember: Chaos is Not Dangerous.
Tools from the Center for New Psychology
Publisher: Doris Jeanette, Holistic Psychology Mentor, Coach
Do you want to be perfect?
Do you find fault with people who are slow or unsure?
Perhaps you have an inner critic called “Ms. Perfect” or “Mr. Never Satisfied.” Perfectionism is a serious upper class mental health problem. Even the middle and lower classes can think being perfect has it virtues. A la the White Picket Fence Envy Syndrome of those living outside the perfect house where the perfect family live with the perfect kids and perfect jobs.
Perfect people cannot let go of control and experience colors, feelings, and emotions. Therefore, if you try to be perfect you do not enjoy vibrant moments, playful lovemaking, and heart-felt happiness. Being spontaneous, free, and joyful are rare events if you spend your time trying to be perfect.
Trying to be perfect makes you anxious and keeps you controlled. Since you are afraid of doing something wrong and bad, you severely inhibit your body and how it moves. This causes mental illness, sleepless nights, boredom, and physical diseases. Notice how much energy being perfect consumes.
Early in my career I discovered that perfect people were always afraid that if they let go of control they would be out of control. Perhaps you also need to know that when you let go of control you are not automatically in an out of control state. You may feel out of control since you are not used to chaos. Chaos is a period of time where you experience being a mess or making a mess.
If you do not have a mess or become a mess, from time to time, then you are stuck in a tiny perfect place of rigidity. Messes are part of the natural process of transformation. Chaos is not an out of control state. It is a necessary state you must accept, if you want to be successful in personal growth and make dramatic changes in your life.
Note what the scientist credited with discovering Chaos Theory, Edward Lorenz, called his paper in 1972: “Predictability: Does the Flap of a Butterfly’s Wings in Brazil set off a Tornado in Texas?” Indeed it could and more. Chaos fuels personal growth, change, and transformation.
Some of you may be familiar with the ongoing story of the man in North Carolina on the CBS Evening News who is dying and finding deep meaning and purpose to his life. In March, 2015, we learned that he had tested the “butterfly effect” to see if one act of kindness in a North Carolina restaurant could go around the world. His act of kindness reached Africa.
What about you? What do you set off when you flap your wings or break free? What happens when you stop controlling yourself and create a mess? What are the results of not washing the dishes and making love instead?
We know from Chaos Theory that Mother Nature does indeed know what she is doing. Disorder, just like feeling your emotions, moves into order naturally on its own. It is safe to let go of control and enjoy the natural flow of your energy. Your natural energy flow gives you peak experiences and makes you physically stronger and mentally healthier.
On the other hand, being out of control is dangerous. Flying mental energy bolting around without awareness is dangerous. When your energy is not grounded, you are out of control. This means you need to quickly get back in your body and ground your energy so you do not hurt yourself or others.
Chaos is not dangerous. Chaos is part of nature and obeys natural laws. Go ahead and let go of control. Enjoy being an artist and free spirit, make a mess and reap the benefits of being creative and happy.
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